Least you harm none. Gossip that includes a negative attitude about a person is harmful to the person being talked about, the gossiper, and the receiver. Gossip is rarely repeated verbatim.
Usually people add their own take on the situation or they add their interruption of the original message. Gossip attacks another person's character and demeans their worth, while positive information helps build their character and confidence. Gossip is not like second hand clothing; you can wash the dirt out of second hand clothing, but it is much harder, if not impossible, to cleanse the dirt from second hand gossip.
A negative attitude, which usually causes gossip, is a challenge that a person has not overcome as yet; perhaps they are working on it and perhaps they don't realize they have it yet. Regardless, it is 'their' challenge. When a negative attitude is pointed out in someone else, it cannot be recognized unless the pointer has had experience with that same attitude. "It takes one to know one."
Get into the habit of stopping a person who is telling you some gossip and ask them "Is this positive information about such and such, or is it nasty negative stuff?" If you hear that someone is gossiping about you behind your back, go to that person and ask them what their concerns are. Don't get caught up in the 'he said, she said' game and definitely don't get caught up in sending harmful 'thought daggers' at the person.
Gossip is really criticizim. Most of the time a person criticizes another because they themselves feel incomplete and often don't even realize it. Also the criticizim that you give about another person is often something you yourself should be doing for yourself and aren't.
Check closely and honestly what you've been saying about people to see if you aren't just getting back what you sent out. A good rule of thumb is, if it isn't worth saying to their face, don't say it behind their back.
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